Diary: The pressure to make high quality content.

So it’s like five in the morning over here and I can’t sleep so I decided to work on my blog. Something that has been on my mind for a couple of years now is the feeling that I have to produce high end quality videos on my youtube channel.

I also start to feel this pressure for my blog ever since I made a portfolio tab.

Something that started as fun and me just doing my thing all of the sudden turned into something with a lot of pressure. I’m always going back and forth in my mind with the question why?

It started a couple years ago, around the time I went to uni, all of the sudden my random videos didn’t feel like they were good enough. You don’t see that I make a lot of videos behind the scenes that never ever make it to youtube. But recently, since I announced my ‘big’  comeback to youtube I decided that that was enough. I try to make the best out of all the videos I make. Keeping in mind that I do produce high end quality videos on the side but that that content isn’t public, it’s for my student organization so they never make it public.

But still the pressure got the best of me because I’m working on articles on my blog, way too long by the way. But I always make excuses to hold up the publishing because the photo’s aren’t exactly right. Something to do with lighting or my camera that doesn’t do what I want. So I have a lot of photographs that never see the day of light. And a lot of hours you can never tell I put into my work. That’s why the whole eyebrow pencil comparison review takes so damn long before it’s published. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that I will publish it at the end of this week or at the beginning of next week.

I’m going to try to put FUN back in youtube and blogging. Because it’s making me miserable to not out these creations and just putting it on the side because something wouldn’t be ‘good enough’.

Yeah that’s just something on the top of my mind.